Classical Theism, Philosophy, and Religion Forum / People who Avoid Argument

**Posted by iwpoe** 4/09/2016 9:29 pm

Today I tried to have an argument.

I presented a concise and well structured set of reasons to establish 3 key points.

My interlocutor replied "I'm not going to have a discussion with you because you have a set opinion" adding "you're a sociopath."

ಠ_ಠ

Last edited by iwpoe (4/09/2016 9:40 pm)

**Posted by AKG** 4/09/2016 10:33 pm

What were you trying to argue?

**Posted by iwpoe** 4/09/2016 10:43 pm

An uninteresting matter about why a particular action taken by character in a drama which was controversial is not only not wrong but well justified.

The disputed point was over weather one is ever justified in ending friendships and weather it is acceptable to date a former friend's major ex-boyfriend. I argue yes and yes.

**Posted by AKG** 4/10/2016 4:23 am

Was this is a chick flick? It sounds like a chick flick.

Last edited by AKG (4/10/2016 4:23 am)

**Posted by iwpoe** 4/10/2016 5:04 am

AKG wrote:
Was this is a chick flick? It sounds like a chick flick.

It *is* a chick show, yes: HBO's Girls. I like some and think it's helpful to watch them.

The controversy about it in the fandom does seem to divide fairly neatly along gender lines- with only some women feeling strongly that your friends both have to be loyal to your whims and never date your exs, while few if any male viewers think so.

**Posted by Seán Mac Críodáin** 4/11/2016 11:16 am

I think it would be a major slight to get with a friend's ex if they aren't entirely over that person. That's a recipe for jealousy. You said "former friend", though, implying contact has been cut, so it shouldn't be a cause for complaint in that case.

But we're talking about serial monogamy and/or casual sex, so no one should be doing that sort of thing on the first place.

**Posted by iwpoe** 4/11/2016 12:28 pm

Seán Mac Críodáin wrote:
I think it would be a major slight to get with a friend's ex if they aren't entirely over that person.

I get that, but I think in the context of the show that the relationship is depicted as a major connection, not a casual one. I think in the context of a friendship you should absolutly avoid casual relationships with a friend's ex for the sake of jelousy control, but in the case of major relationships, I think it's differnt.

My opinion is that major connections are so relitivly rare and important to overall life happiness that it's too much of a friend to ask that you avoid them. I think it's on the friend to supress the jelousy in that case rather than on you to supress the connection.

I would consider your friend attempting some kind of reconciliation a complicating factor, but if the relationship is fully over, then I think the friend needs to stand aside since her claim over the ex has no valid target and your case for him is very strong.

Seán Mac Críodáin wrote:
But we're talking about serial monogamy and/or casual sex, so no one should be doing that sort of thing on the first place.

The first is natural marriage, whether anyone wants to admit it or not. But I'm granting the general attitude about sex in any case for the sake of discussion.

Anyway, the dilemma could easily arise (and, indeed, does in the books) in a Jane Austen 'primarily flirting and mooning' style of romance.